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April 10, 2009     Heritage Florida Jewish News
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April 10, 2009

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i HERITAGE FLORIDA JEWISH NEWS, APRIL 10, 2009 i PAGE 9A By Gloria Yousha -- Call 407-657-9405 or 407-834-8787 Benjamin Netanyahu Here's my buddy again... Bibi Netanyahu is once again leader of Israel. This was taken directly from the internet: Benjamin Netanyahu, taking office as Israel's new leader last Tuesday [March 31], promised to seek "full peace" with the Arab and Muslim world, but refused to utter the words the world was waiting to hear: "Palestinian state." The well- spoken, U.S.-educated hawk took pains to portray himself as a pragmatist, telling a packed parliament that Israel does not want to rule the Palestinians. "Under the permanent status agreement, the Palestinians will have all the author- ity to rule themselves," Netanyahu said in comments that appeared to hark back to a decades-old notion that peace could be achieved through limited Palestinian autonomy. His words drew a sharp reaction from Palestinian negotiator Saeb Erekat. "I want to say to Mr. Netanyahu that the only way the Palestinians can rule themselves, by themselves, is through ending the Israeli occupation that began in 1967 and establishing an independent Palestinian state," Erekat said. Netanyahu's refusal to embrace the idea of Palestinian statehood could put him at odds with the Obama administra- tion and much of the rest of the world. So could his decision to appoint ultranationalist politician Avigdor Lieberman as foreign minister. In recent days, however, Netanyahu has moved to soften his image, welcoming the centrist Labor party into an oth- erwise markedly right-wing coalition and announcing that he supports peace talks with the Palestinians. The 59-year-old politician, the son of a prominent historian and the brother of war hero, Jonathan (Yonni) Netanyahu, who died commanding the daring 1976 hostage rescue at Entebbe, Uganda, is returning to the premiership a decade after being forced from it amid a string of failures. In his speech before parliament last Tuesday [March 31] Netanyahu praised Islamic culture as "great and rich," and said Israel and moderate Arab states could find common ground fighting radical Islam and what he called the extremist regime in Tehran. "Israel has always, and today more than ever, striven to reach full peace with the entire Arab and Muslim world," he said. (I know Bibi is a hawk...but a Palestinian state would allow them to have a Palestinian army. Think about it.) I thought about it and now I need a joke... Judith meets Isaac at a dance and they seem to hit it off quite nicely. So much so that they agree to go out for din- ner the following night. Isaac says he will pick her up at her house at 8pm. The following evening, Judith spends quality time getting herself ready for what she hopes will be the start of a new romance. Finally, she is ready. She walks over to the mirror and looks at herself. What she sees is an attractive, sexy, well made-up young woman, wearing a low-cut but very chic evening dress, matching satin shoes, and the vintage pearl necklace and matching earrings her bubbeh gave her. She is pleased with what she sees and sits down to wait for Isaac. But she is very disappointed when 8 p.m. arrives and there's no sign of him. She continues to wait in hope, but there's still no Isaac. At 9.30 p.m., Judith gives up. Crying, she runs up- stairs to the bathroom and roughly wipes off all her make-up, smudging her lipstick over her mouth. But she doesn't care. She goes into her bedroom, changes out of her lovely dress and puts on her shmata pajamas. Finally, she takes off her shoes, puts on her slippers and goes downstairs to watch TV. But as soon as she sits down, the doorbell rings. When Judith opens it, there stands Isaac with a bunch of flowers in his hand. He looks at Judith with a worried look on his face and says to her, "Judith, what's going on? I'm nearly two hours late, and you're still not ready?" (I had a few dates like that myself!) Speaking of jokes and jokesters... GAIL and EDDIE MARCUS have many grandchildren... nine I think. JUSTIN PENA, son of RON and BETH PENA is one of them. He is a first grader. According to Gail and Ed- die, Justin is a comedian... and a fine one, too! I asked him to tell me some jokes. He didn't hesitate: Question: "Why did the skeleton refuse to cross the street?" Answer: "He had no guts!" Question: "Why didn't the skeleton go to his prom?" Answer: "He had no body to take!" (OK...funny stuff. Made me laugh!) A lot is happening at the bookstore... On Tuesday, April 14, at 7:30 p.m., celebrated poet BENJAMIN S. GROSSBERG Justin Pena will be at Urban Think! Bookstore. Benjamin S. Grossberg of Clayton, Ohio, won the 2008 Tam- pa Review Prize for Poetry for "Sweet Core Orchard"(2009). Grossberg, who taught creative writing and poetry for the past eight years at Antioch College, until its closing this summer, is a self-confessed apple lover. He planted his own small orchard--mostly Granny Smiths--at his home in Ohio, calling it "Sweet Core Orchard," a name that became the title of his second book of poetry. This summer Grossberg will have to leave his orchard, carrying with him his prize- winning book title and the hope to plant again in the future. With Antioch College now closed, he is moving from Ohio to Hartford, Conn., where he will be starting in the fall as an assistant profes- Benjamin Grossberg sor teaching creative writing and poetry at the University of Hartford. His first book, "Underwater Lengths in a Single Breath," winner of the 2005 Snyder Prize, was published by Ashland Poetry Press in 2007, receiving high praise from poets and critics including Richard Howard, who wrote, "I rejoice that these poems are in the world of American letters." Grossberg's poems have also appeared widely in literary journals, including Paris Review, Southwest Review, North American Review, and in The Pushcart Book of Poetry: The Best Poems from the First 30 Years of the Pushcart Prize. His chapbook, "The Auctioneer Bangs his Gavel," was published by Kent State in 2006. Thanks to the generous sponsorship of Dr. Ilyse Kusnetz and the Valencia Community College department of English, Ben Grossberg will appear. On Thursday, April 16, at 5:30 p.m., MARK HOSE will sign his book, "Table For One." Local author Mark Hose, recently with Baker, Barrios Architects, has penned a delightful new novel. In "Table for One," he tells the story of Dylan Locane, 32, who relies on entertaining friendships to camouflage his inner demon. As his desire to end his romantic void begins to erode his social popularity and auspicious career, Dylan wonders: Is it pos- sible to be happy--not just content or appreciative, but truly happy--living a "Table for One" lifestyle? Through various adventures--some comical, some tortuous, some insight- ful--Dylan discovers the answer to his haunting question. Urban Think! Bookstore is at 625 E. Central Blvd., Orlando. One for the road... Judith picks a firm of attorneys from the Yellow Pages and makes an appointment to see someone from their Family department. "How can I help you, madam?" asks the lawyer. "Is it true," asks Judith, "that if I get divorced, I'm entitled to 50 percent of all of my husband's possessions?" "Welt," the lawyer replies, "the law firm would get their fee, of course, but even after this payment, it is usually the case that the woman ends up receiving at least 50 percent, maybe a bit more, of her husband's entire assets. So tell me, are you ready for a divorce at this moment?" %)h no," replies Judith, "I need to find a husband first." One more for the road... Aaron and Renee are driving back from a short holiday when their car is involved in a minor accident. Aaron wasn't concentrating and he hit a parked car. Fortunately, no one is hurt. Within minutes a police officer arrives at the scene. "So what happened?" the officer asks Aaron, smiling. "How did you manage to hit that car? It couldn't have been easy." Aaron immediately replies, "It was Renee's fault." "Why do you say that?" asks the officer, making notes. "Because," replies Aaron, "she fell asleep in the back seat." can be purchased at the following locations: Orange County JCC, 851 N. Maitland Ave., Maitland • Borders, 600 N. Orlando Ave., Winter Park • SOJC, 11200 S. 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